Saturday, November 24, 2012

Another Side of the Holidays - When you lose a loved one

This time of the year is filled with families who are getting together and enjoying time together. Sometime during that time together they will likely share in a meal together. For some people, there may be more than one “Thanksgiving” meal that is shared with more than one family unit. For some families, they will go to Thanksgiving at one side of their family tree and Christmas at the other side.

As you know, with holidays like Thanksgiving we tend to focus on being thankful and gratitude. These are great things to be focused on in a world that tends to focus on problems. Then, all the positive that comes with Christmas and the “most wonderful time of the year.” Who cannot help but to love this time of year? However, there are some that may not be at the pinnacle of the idealistic side of the holidays.

As this time of year is often spent with family, there stands some special population that sometimes seems to be overlooked or shoved to the side. I am speaking of those who have lost loved ones over the past year. I know that there will be those who have already spent their “first” holiday season, birthday, and other special days without their loved one, but there is something about that “first” season away from a loved one.

In the past year, I have known several who fall into this category. Though I hadn’t spent several of the previous holiday seasons with my grandma and uncle, I have lost them both in the recent months. Along with that, a great gentleman who I was close to was suddenly killed on a motorcycle accident this past summer.

As I think about these three individuals, my heart goes out to their families. In the case of my grandmother, my father and his siblings lost their mother. In the case of my uncle, he left behind a wife, two sons and their families, and three sisters, plus other family members. In the case of my friend, he leaves behind a wife, three kids and their families, plus other family members.

As I reflect on these three situations I cannot help but wonder how this Thanksgiving and Christmas will affect them. For several, they have spent several of these holidays with that loved one and this one is going to have a void.

Along with that void there will be sadness and tears. Although this is a season that is normally positive in nature, for those with a void in their holiday season, all positive will be at least a bit clouded by the vacancy of their loved one.

To no longer have your loved one in your life is going to present its various levels of difficulty as you venture into the holiday season. With that void in one’s life this season may not be the “most wonderful time of the year” because you will be missing that person who, a few months before, was in your life.

For those who are experiencing their “first” holiday season without a special loved one, I would like to say I will be praying for you as you travel through this holiday season without them. If you know of someone in this special population, I would like to ask you to be praying for those you know. Pray that God may comfort them as they reflect on their past, which they were fortunate to spend with their loved one. May the Great Comforter fill the void for all of you who are missing something this holiday season.

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