Another Side of the Holidays - When you lose a loved one

This time of the year is filled with families who are getting together and enjoying time together. Sometime during that time together they will likely share in a meal together. For some people, there may be more than one “Thanksgiving” meal that is shared with more than one family unit. For some families, they will go to Thanksgiving at one side of their family tree and Christmas at the other side.

As you know, with holidays like Thanksgiving we tend to focus on being thankful and gratitude. These are great things to be focused on in a world that tends to focus on problems. Then, all the positive that comes with Christmas and the “most wonderful time of the year.” Who cannot help but to love this time of year? However, there are some that may not be at the pinnacle of the idealistic side of the holidays.

As this time of year is often spent with family, there stands some special population that sometimes seems to be overlooked or shoved to the side. I am speaking of those who have lost loved ones over the past year. I know that there will be those who have already spent their “first” holiday season, birthday, and other special days without their loved one, but there is something about that “first” season away from a loved one.

In the past year, I have known several who fall into this category. Though I hadn’t spent several of the previous holiday seasons with my grandma and uncle, I have lost them both in the recent months. Along with that, a great gentleman who I was close to was suddenly killed on a motorcycle accident this past summer.

As I think about these three individuals, my heart goes out to their families. In the case of my grandmother, my father and his siblings lost their mother. In the case of my uncle, he left behind a wife, two sons and their families, and three sisters, plus other family members. In the case of my friend, he leaves behind a wife, three kids and their families, plus other family members.

As I reflect on these three situations I cannot help but wonder how this Thanksgiving and Christmas will affect them. For several, they have spent several of these holidays with that loved one and this one is going to have a void.

Along with that void there will be sadness and tears. Although this is a season that is normally positive in nature, for those with a void in their holiday season, all positive will be at least a bit clouded by the vacancy of their loved one.

To no longer have your loved one in your life is going to present its various levels of difficulty as you venture into the holiday season. With that void in one’s life this season may not be the “most wonderful time of the year” because you will be missing that person who, a few months before, was in your life.

For those who are experiencing their “first” holiday season without a special loved one, I would like to say I will be praying for you as you travel through this holiday season without them. If you know of someone in this special population, I would like to ask you to be praying for those you know. Pray that God may comfort them as they reflect on their past, which they were fortunate to spend with their loved one. May the Great Comforter fill the void for all of you who are missing something this holiday season.

Coldness of Not Being Cared About

During the holidays a popular song that is sung is "Baby, It's Cold Outside".  And, lately it has been that, throughout most of the US.  People are trying to stay warm. Schools started late; churches canceled gatherings.  If I had to choose between cold and hot, even though I prefer about 75-80 degrees, I would choose cold.  At least you can put on more layers, but you can only take off so much to be cooler.  But sometimes, when in the cold, you can only put on so many layers.  The worst is when you feel cold on the inside, and "once you're cold, you're cold".  At this point it makes it very difficult to be warm again while in the cold.

However, if you were speaking in the realm of relationships, I would much rather be warmer than cooler.  Relationships are made to be warm to be positive.  Cold relationships are not a draw. 

With the weather being cooler this time of year, people aren't out as much. They naturally want to stay in, where it is warm.  Those same people have no warmth in their life, other than from a heater.  They are in need of a relationship.  Do you know people like that?  Are there people in your neighborhood like that?  Why not invite them over to a gathering at your house?  Maybe send them a card with a packet of hot chocolate in the envelope?

When people feel they're not cared about, they feel cold.  Let's be the type of Christians that can warm people up...as a song goes I sang years ago in my youth..."it only takes a spark to get a fire going"!

Let's warm people up!





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Monday Mentionings: Dedication of the Wall: Nehemiah 12:27

Good News! I just checked and relief (as I would describe it) from the heat is in sight! By the time some of you read this, it may have already changed. I look forward to the warmer temperatures about March, but in October I look forward to the cooler temperatures.

After all the building that took place by the Jews, the wall around Jerusalem has been completed and is now being dedicated. Once a big project is completed, a time of celebration tends to follow. They celebrated "with gladness, with thanksgiving and with singing, with cymbals, harps, and lyres." (English Standard Version) God helped the finish the walls, but He was not finished with them. Just like God is not finished with us. We are both, in a sense, always "Under Construction". As we ended the series with a dedication, let us look at how we can dedicate ourselves, regularly, to God by these applications...

1. Smile - Rededicate yourself through a smile. A good, meaningful smile means that you are glad. Gladness has positive health results, promoting a longer life of service to God! So, smile, and then, go serve!
2. Thanksgiving - Rededicate yourself through being thankful. Many jobs can be very thankless. Rarely did I get "thanked" from a participating team, for umpiring. God gives and gives, and we probably overlook many of the things that He does give - clean air, potable water, etc. Be a servant of thanks!
3. Praise - Rededicate yourself through praise. What is a favorite praise song? Take time to sing or hum it regularly this week. As Psalm 40:3-4 talks about a "new song" that has been put in our mouth...maybe you can make up a new song to praise God with!
4. Instruments - Rededicate yourself through being instrumental. Be instrumental in getting the message of Jesus out there. Maybe it will be through a compliment, a card/e-mail, a phone call, being patient, or whatever. Just be conscientious about the many opportunities that we get to be God's hands and feet on earth. How will you be instrumental for Him?

Have a great week and look forward to the cooler temperatures!

Serving Him ~