Jesus' Blended Family - A message that reminds us about our commitment to the spiritual family

What comes to your mind when you think of a spiritual family? Your thoughts could be anything from simple words like good, love, or hate, or your thoughts could go to "I don't believe in a 'spiritual' family," "They are a bunch of hypocrites," "We are not close, we are not any kind of a family," or some other elaborated answer.

If you were to define what family, in this sense means, it would probably come from this definition, "a group of people united by certain convictions or a common affiliation." One's spiritual family would be connected by their belief in certain religious convictions. They may not be the exact same, but most would agree the "core" of the beliefs are similar.

Jesus was told that His family was wanting to visit with Him in Matthew 12:46-50. He then replies with a question that can be summed up with this question, "Who is my family?" When it comes to the type of family Jesus answers with, He is basically describing a blended family of different genders, races, cultures, and beliefs. That all together makes up Jesus' family! Here are some applications to choose from to use this week...

• Understanding ~ When Jesus answers this question, in the text, He uses the word "whoever." This world will be an umbrella term for everyone. For some, that may have really strong biases or prejudices, this word may challenge your thinking. To think about someone who has a lower education, children out of wedlock, drinks too much, cusses like a sailor, dresses different than you deem "normal," likes the same gender, has a different color skin, wears a turban, and the list could continue, that any of these could be welcome to receive the grace that Jesus offers and have their sins forgiven may seem preposterous. Some of these are lifestyle sins and some of these are simply differences. The ones that are lifestyle would need to change their lifestyle in order to continue to enjoy that grace. For the ones that are simply "differences" then we may need to just "accept" and not judge them. Let us be understand of who the "whoever" is when it comes to Jesus' invitation.
• Just at Your Church? ~ As I mentioned a definition of family, think about how that applies to you spiritually. I am focusing on those who have a religious affiliation. Are you seeing those who are "within" your church building's walls as they only "Christians?" Are they the only one's you foresee joining up with you in heaven some day? What do you think would be your reaction if you were wrong in your thinking and there was someone else...maybe me...there as well? I think it would be surprising to some to find out who is going to be there. I have to say that I may be surprised as well. May we try to find the main point of our beliefs and be open to others who may share in that same set of beliefs.
• Love Less ~ Remember that whether we are talking about our own biological family or our spiritual family, we are still to love Jesus more. However, because Christ is the head of the spiritual body, would we say we should love our spiritual family moreso than our biological family? I think they may rank a bit higher. When they are one-in-the-same, then that is a totally different variable. Let us love Him most!a group of people united by certain convictions or a common

Though we may be able to trace our family trees so far back and find out exactly who is on our tree, one thing we will never know is how many we have in our spiritual family until we make it to heaven. As you go through your week, ask God to open doors to lead you to people that need to hear about Jesus. They may be related!

Now it's your turn...what is it that you like best and least about having a spiritual familie?

Join in With Someone in the Journey of Life

Life is not the same for any one person. We all live through different experiences, different fashion times, different music times, different families, and the differences could continue. So when two people enter into a life together, they are going to bring those differences with them.

If you've been in a long-term relationship, what were some of the differences that made the relationship the challenge? What made it that much more rewarding?

As much as I like to have "me" time, I could not imagine what life would be like without the blessing of the company of my wife, son and daughter. I love them so much and that brings us to this week's quote...

Get a life in which you are not alone. Find people you love, and who love you. And remember that love is not leisure, it is work. ~ Anna Quindlen

Relationships are not easy, but they are very rewarding! When we put in work, we reap the benefits. Sometimes we can reap the benefits anyway, but to work at it is rewarding without the benefits.

So, "get a life" and spend time with people, but it will take effort...Keep that in mind.

Now, you have the opportunity to answer the question posted in the first part of the post...

FALL: Love Mercifully

How deep does your love go? You may say that it depends on the person. I think we are all at that point. However, isn't it great that God didn't have that same philosophy? To love mankind didn't "depend on the person." In a world full of "who you know" then it is nice to have a God that loves us all evenly and sent His son for everyone.

Imagine if our love from God was based on a point system or we were placed on tiers. The stress that would cause may be too much for some to handle. I know I'd struggle. But oftentimes, we treat others as if they were on a point system or how close they are to us, right?

Look across some of the people you know...wouldn't you do "more" for some than you would for someone else? It seems natural to do that, though it may not be correct. Sunday, we looked at the Parable of the Good Samaritan and how the person who received the parable was instructed to "love mercifully." As we reflect on that, here are some applications to choose from to use...

• Finding a Loophole ~ Sometimes employees or students will fulfill a requirement but only do what is required of them, nothing more. Of course, in some cases doing more will not get you further, but not all things are tangible that may be doing more. When you are asked to do something, are you ever tempted to just do the minimum? Have you ever "looked the other way" at something that needs done? May we not not look for a loophole in our quest to fulfill any requirement laid before us.
• Look for Opportunities ~ To turn a blind eye to help someone is a way of missing an opportunity. The opportunity may not be to help them with their actual request, it could mean to help them in another way (which is almost limitless) Keep your eyes open to see how you can offer a hand of mercy to someone. (Please don't limit yourself to think of only ways you can help that are physical)
• Fight Through ~ One time I was asked if I would offer to help someone if they had just "hit me." I said "Yes." This was s surprise to them (the setting was a teachable moment while subbing in a school). Once I was being treated poorly by my employer and in my last remaining days fighting through to still give 100% was difficult, but I was able to do it. May you fight through times that are tempting to not offer your kindness to someone.

To love (action) by doing it mercifully (adjective describing the action) is deep. It may be difficult to do, but we are challenged to do that to our "neighbors."

May we be the best "Good Samaritans" we can be this week!

Now it's your turn...what has been your experience with "good Samaritans?"

“IF”–You Give Everything But Do Not Have Love

Ever heard the phrase, “attitude is everything”? It is generally used in situations where you are being inspired to do better – sporting event, scholastically, etc. Regardless, there is a lot of truth and depth to the phrase. There are tasks that I enjoy doing, but I have to be in the right frame of mind to do it because it is all about attitude.

When it comes to giving – money or yourself – that phrase also holds true. What is your attitude toward giving? Are you protective-conservative, protective-generous, or just generous?

Sunday, we looked at the last part of this series that dealt with giving all you have – possessions or yourself – but not giving it in love. One that gives, but in a showy or attention-seeking manner, gives without exhibiting love. Here are some applications to choose from to use this week…

• Why Give? ~ People have been made to feel guilty to give. Some feel cornered and there is no way out. Some prepare to set aside so much money to give to people/causes. There are so many worthy causes to give to in this world. Someone, some thing, somewhere need you – whether it is your money or your time/talents. May we take the time to think about why we’re giving. May the reason be as pure and caring toward the cause (not toward you) as possible.
• Give More ~ Just when it seems that there is nothing else to give, if you dig deep enough you will find that there is. The “extra” may not be in monetary value, but it would be measured in your time or talents. Look for ways to give a little extra to something else you feel passionate about.

Doing things out of guilt or obligation are not the means to be able to show love. Giving out of love is the only way to show love. It may sound simple but keep in mind attitude is everything!

“IF”…I Have Great Faith But Not Love

I remember when I was thinking about getting into preaching (which was the furthest from my career-intended mind) I was a bit naïve and ignorant. I didn’t have a clue what all was really involved, and the depth of that involvement. I knew that a preacher preached, worked in an office, married and buried people, visited people, taught classes, and counseled people.

These were many of the descriptions of what a preacher would do. They each took up varied amounts of his week. Many ministers are good at most of the properties and challenged by the rest.

There is a common ingredient that must be interlaced throughout it all, love. If a preacher has an ability to do all of these with great success, but not love, then it does him no good.

Sure, he may be able to externally perform them, but without much love for those who he is ministering to, the tasks are unimportant. That concept works with everyone and how they view love versus the various abilities they possess.

Sunday we looked at how faith without love does not profit us anything. Here are some applications to choose from to use this week…

• “Things” are not important ~ Most of us would like to have more “things” in life. Whether they were material things or abilities/talents. Having all the “things” in the world, but not love is meaningless and we should weigh it as that.
• Worthless is not Worthwhile ~ Though there are good things about having very little as it can humble us. Here being “nothing” is literally that. Being nothing is not of any aim for us. However, that is our destination if we do not have love.

Being able to love can be a tricky process. Taking the “softness” out and keeping it practical in all circles can take some time to understand what love actually entails. What is very important to recognize that no matter what we have or can do, if we don’t have love, it is worthless.

Blue vs. Pink

Practically all of us grew up with the concept of having boys and girls being differentiated by blue and pink. Blue is manly and pink is girly. We even judge on those differentiations, especially for the guy because if he is wearing much pink then there is a stigma attached. However, the same goes, especially for a baby girl, if she is wearing too much blue.

Is it wrong to wear pink for a guy or blue for a girl or is it just different?  With Valentine’s Day right around the corner, I thought this may be a good quote to put out there…

Blue and pink, not wrong, just different.  ~ Emerson Eggerichs, author of “Love and Respect”

To give a brief background on this quote, man and woman are indicated by these two colors. Think that the man hears, sees, and speaks “blue.”  Whereas the woman hears, sees, and speaks “pink.”  This author lists a few examples of phrases we may say that are heard differently.

One example is “I don’t have any clothes to wear.”  If you say that to the blue group, you will get one response (typically – no clothes clean). You say that to the pink group and you will probably get a totally different response (typically – my clothes are outdated, I need new ones).  (If you’ve never heard this concept, ask your significant other and see if their response is anywhere close to the "typical”).

Enjoy your relationship and though we may think differently and react differently, that is what we are…blue and pink, not wrong, just different!

My Valentine’s Day Recommendation for Books for Couples:

Love and Respect – by Emerson Eggerichs

For Women Only & For Men Only – Each by Shaunti Feldhahn

Power of a Praying Wife & Power of a Praying Husband – Each by Stormie Omartian

When it is Not Encouragement

Encouragement is one of the greatest things that the human heart/spirit can receive.  It lifts you up, it gives you a boost, and it energizes you.  Encouragement when you least expect it is probably one of the best forms.  An e-mail, a phone call, an out-of-the-blue interaction with someone, a card, a text, a comment on Facebook, etc.  These can all be ways people can use to encourage.  However there are ways that people may think they're encouraging when they are not.  That brings us to this week's quote...

Correction and encouragement given without love will not correct or encourage. ~ Joseph Simmons, aka "Rev Run"

In the thirteenth chapter of First Corinthians, in the Bible, we see the author, Paul, telling his recipients what love is not, before he says what love is.  He compares ones words to a resounding gong or a clanging cymbal. Describing how we can say one thing but are feeling another way we are just making a lot of noise.

I think there are people who may love but do not know how to encourage or correct. I know someone who sees me from time to time and will say "You're getting better and better all the time".  That phrase really annoys me, but I know that their "love" for me is there, they just don't know how to express encouragement any differently to me.

However, there are the others, who may try to correct or encourage but do not have love for you.  Their correction or encouragement is vain and does not accomplish its goal.  Maybe it is done out of anger or haste, where love may be present most of the time, but in these situations emotions are high enough that love is absent.  The next time you are thinking of encouraging or correcting, check the "how-much-do-you-care" meter before continuing with your words.

Lift someone up, put someone in their place, but do it all out of love and care!

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"I Don't...Hear You" - Proverbs 12:18

She says, "How do I look?"

He says, "Fine!"

How did that conversation go after that point?  It depends on how you read it and most of it has to do with the way you read the man's answer.  Did you read it envisioning him saying it through a newspaper, not even giving much more than a glance?  Did you read it envisioning him saying it in the middle of a TV show/sports game and wanting her to move out of the way so he can see the next play?  Did you read it envisioning him looking her up and down and giving her the "J.J.", from "Good Times, type of emphasis that may be stretched out a bit like "FINNNE"?

What was it she was wanting to know?  Was she wanting to know if her tags were tucked in or if her clothes matched?  No, she wanted to know if the guy that had her heart thought she was "rockin' his world" by what she looked like, no matter how simple or complex the outfit may have been. 

He says about a recently completed project, "What do you think?"

She says, "It's fine!"

I didn't want to use too generalized of a scenario like mowing the lawn because not every guy mows his own lawn.  However, most all guys will complete some type of project, either around the house or at work, that he is proud of and will want to show it to his girl.

So, how did you read it?  Was he showing her the project in the middle of her trying to complete other tasks and she didn't take the time to really look at it, so she was just wanting him to quit showing it to her?  Or was she really interested in something her guy had done and thought it looked really good?

How things are said, both tone and body language, determines to a great degree how they are received.  Yesterday, we concluded our "I Don't" Series by looking at how people can say something and the receiver may interpret it different than intended.  Here are some applications to choose from to use this week...

1. Realize Your Partner Desires Your Attention ~ During the dating time we show a lot of attention to the other person, even in areas we are not interested in.  This just confuses, and possibly deceives, the other person if, after the marriage ceremony, we no longer have that interest.  Let your communication be consistent.  If you've lost that connection, realize you would do well to get it back by showing interest in the areas you used to share in.
2. Realize Opposite Genders Hear Differently ~ Something exactly the same may be said to two people of the opposite gender and it will mean a world of something different.  A guy may come out to show how he looks in an outfit and the wife may get away with saying a simple "Fine" response.  However, said the same way to her and it may not be received well. 
3. Realize Words Can Be Like Daggers ~ This doesn't even have to include "put downs" nor does it have to just include disagreements.  If you say, "That's the worst ___ ever!" and the response is "No, it isn't", you will either be comforted or left fuming.  It all depends on the response.  Reading it, it is just words, saying it is different.  But words can be daggers that don't have to be a "response", just what we say determines how someone feels after our sentence is completed.  Be conscious of how you come across.  A man's voice to a female can be comforting or "barking".  A woman's voice to a man can be sweet or annoying.

What we hear may not be our fault, as we're made differently.  Learning to hear differently for the sake of understanding someone is a pursuit worth taking.  Possibly half of misunderstandings, specifically, between opposite genders will be a result of the fact that we speak, hear, and see differently.  "Not wrong, just different" (Emerson Eggerichs). 

Think about some of these things as you have your future conversations with people.

  

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Love and a Rubix Cube

The Rubix Cube came out sometime in the 1980s and I was one of millions that had one of those toys.  I was also one of the millions who couldn't solve it "legally" (I would take it apart and put it back together).  I would turn it here and there, here and there, but never quite figure it out.  I would get one, maybe two sides right, but those other 4-5 were just not looking solid.  Life can be like that, as well as, love, which brings us to this week's quote...

Love is like the perfect Rubix Cube.  There are countless number of wrong twists and turns, but when you get it right, it looks perfect no matter what way you look at it.  ~ Brian Cramer

Twist, turn, study, twist, turn, study, intermixed with wrong twists and turns. That really can be one of many ways to look at life and love. You try to solve a temporary situation, and so you make a couple of adjustments, but then, you notice that on another side there is a jumbled mess.  So, you go after it again, trying to get all the sized to correspond to their appropriate color.

How many sides are you getting to match up lately?  How has life and/or love been treating you?  This month is filled with love and romance.  Reds and pinks are filling the environment due to the nature of Valentine's Day.

As you continue on in life, think about all the twists and turns that come your way.  Some may be incorrect, but eventually they will come out where all the colors match up.

Enjoy life and love!

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Receiving More than You Give

 When you're a kid and you are fed with the line "it is better to give than to receive" it may make you roll your eyes or something like that.  At that stage in your life you tend to want things and that is all you care about...What's in it for me?  I remember not being too willing to help out or go with my mom to the nursing home to visit a lady.  Those weren't fun, they didn't make a difference in my day or life.  

However, something changed when I got a little bit older.  Thinking back, as I write this, one of the memorable times was having a "little brother" through the Big Brothers/Big Sisters program.  I was a freshman in college and I don't know what prompted me to do it.  Sometimes it was difficult finding 3 hours a week to spend with him.  However, most of the time we spent together was very enjoyable and definitely rewarding.  That brings us to this week's quote...

Love and kindness are never wasted.  They always make a difference.  They bless the one who receives them, and they bless you, the giver.  ~ Barbara De Angelis

One particular moment I remember with my "little brother" was when I had taken him to a college football game I was working as a student trainer.  It was probably one of the rainiest nights I had ever been in where I had to be outside.  As the football field slopes, the sidelines had, literally, ankle deep water.  Plus, it was a natural field, so there was a lot of mud.  My "little brother" lived outside the city limits and I had not been to his house (I picked him up in town).  So, being nervous about getting stuck, I wondered if he could stay in my dorm room for the night.  All permissions were granted and he had his first experience of college life as an eleven-year old!

Maybe you've had numerous opportunities to give of yourself (time, money, etc.) where you've finished the experience feeling like you received more than the receiver received.  That is the beauty of doing things like that.  From a religious perspective, serving God is much the same way.  You give to Him and what you get is sometimes exponentially more than what you gave.

Keep giving and cashing in on the experiences!




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Hunter or the Hunted

The outdoors is a great place to connect with our Creator. Those who enjoy hunting/fishing feel a sense of relaxation through being outdoors - sometimes for long periods of time. There are times when one will get up earlier than ever, sit in the cold for hours, come home with nothing, and think it was one of the greatest days they've had in a while.

The thrill in the suspense of waiting for that 10-pointer to come around keeps people going out again and again. If that "perfect one" doesn't come around after a long while, then they may settle for a smaller one. However, the fact that they killed a deer (in this case) revs them up! Shooting fowl has similar feelings. Coming home with many-a-bird lets them show off their hunt.

As we go through our life, we must be able to comprehend if we are the hunter or the hunted. Saul was a hunter of God's people, literally. He hunted them down and wanted them destroyed. However, as he was going to Damascus (with the intent to hunt more Christians down), he became the hunted, by God. This event changed him to be a hunter for God. He wanted people to be a part of what he is now a part of, which he was just persecuting people for, days earlier. Here are some applications to choose from to use this week...

1. You make the choice, with each choice, of whether you are going to be the hunter or the hunted - pursuing God vs. pursued by self/Satan/sin. Make the right choice!
2. Leaders are needed in households. Leaders represent the direction of the family. Be a leader in your family that directs the family toward hunting for God.
3. Too much is at risk to not let your family be hunted, instead of hunting. Don't let your family be at risk! Maybe even, take time to pray, read scripture, etc. of an evening, sometime before everyone goes to bed.
4. The next time you go hunting - for game, clothes, a part for machinery, etc. - notice how much effort you put into it, then take a chance to put that much effort into pursuing God.
5. Part of going hunting/fishing/camping is being prepared. Don't let yourself be caught off guard, on a daily basis, for that sudden Satan approach!

It is enjoyable to go hunting, but not enjoyable to be hunted. It raises your blood pressure as your heart beats faster. Overall, not the most healthy for you if you were going through this day after day. One of the best things we can do is to make sure that we are as prepared as possible and to take the offensive side, to hunt for God.

Again, you have to make the choice/commitment of which you are going to be - hunter or hunted. As you go through life, I hope that you will choose to be a hunter, pursuing God with everything He has given you!

Have a great week hunting for God!

Putting the camo on...